Funny life quotes look into how life can be and try to make the best of it, by finding the humor of it all. Life can be tough and what can make it even tougher is a negative gloomy outlook. Funny friendship quotes share a lot of life’s lessons too as having friends is part of life. Learning to laugh at your past and your mistakes can take a lot off your mind and give you some level of comfort.
The quotes on this page are designed to make you laugh and live a little by putting all the stress of life in a place it can do less harm. Laughter is great medicine and if taken in the right dosage will see great results in a short space of time so have a blast at funny soccer quotes. Below are a number of quotes to cheer you up and help you see the positive side of life.
“This too shall pass... It may pass like a kidney stone, but it will pass."
“I don't want to adult today, I just want to dog. I'll be lying down on the floor in the sun, you can pet me and bring me some snacks."
“Dear life, when I said "can this day get any worse" it was a rhetorical question, not a challenge."
“Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery and today is a gift. That's why we call it the "present."
“I had an extremely busy day, converting oxygen into carbon dioxide."
“If you think nobody cares that you're alive try missing a couple of payments."
“Whenever I have a headache I take 2 aspirin and keep away from children, just like it says on the bottle."
“When you are stressed you eat ice cream, cake, chocolate and sweets, because stressed spelled backwards is desserts."
“If you can't laugh at your own problems, call me and I'll laugh at them."
“You have never experienced true fear until a poster falls off the wall in the middle of the night."
“Life's biggest struggle: I need to pee, but I don't want to get out of bed."
“I'm the kind of crazy you weren't warned about because no one knew this level existed.”
“So it turns out that being an adult is mostly just Googling how to do stuff."
“Some friends are like the wind, some are like mountains. They come in and breeze out of your life, or they are there for a lifetime."
“Keep smiling, it makes people wonder what you're up to."
“Be kind to people, and if that's too much to ask for then just be weird to people. It's the least you can do."
“I don't mean to brag, but I put together a puzzle in 1 day and the box said 2-4 years."
“I was gonna take over the world today but I overslept. Postponed, again!"
“I'm a person who wants to do a lot of things trapped in the body of a person who wants to sleep a lot.”
"If you're going through hell, keep going.”
“Ancient Egyptians used to worship cats and write on walls, a practice we still continue to do today on the Internet."
“I love it when strangers smile at me and I smile back, and we have that nice stranger smiling moment."
“Retirement is when you stop living at work, and start working at living."
“I always say "morning" instead of "good morning", because if it was a good morning, I'd still be asleep."
“The first five days after the weekend are always the hardest."
“One day you're 18 eating pizza for every lunch, then suddenly you're 30 and eating salad with celery and kale juice."
“If you have an opinion about my life, please raise your hand. Now put it over your mouth."
“Nothing messes up your Friday like realizing it's only Thursday."
“I'm stuck between "I need to save money" and "You only live once."
“I hate when people ask me what I'm doing tomorrow, I don't even know what I'm doing today."
“I hate having a messy house. Not enough to actually clean it, but enough to give it a disgusted stare while I peacefully relax on the couch."
“Honestly, shopping beats therapy, anytime. It costs the same and you get a dress out of it."
“Childhood injuries: Fell off my bike, fell out of a tree, twisted my ankle. Adult injuries: Slept wrong, sat down too long, sneezed too hard."
“If it's free, it's advice; if you pay for it, it's counseling; if you can use either one, it's a miracle."
“I welcome change as long as nothing is altered or different than before."
“Why must I prove that I am me when I pay bills over the phone? Did some else call to pay my bills, and if they did, why don't you let them?”
“Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don't mind, it doesn't matter."
“I wish I was a kid again so everyone would be proud of me for taking a long nap.”
“I want to be like a caterpillar. Eat a lot, sleep for a while, and then wake up beautiful.”
“Math is fun, it teaches you life and death information, like when you're cold, you should go to a corner since it's 90 degrees there."
"I know my limits. I don't always obey them, but I know them."
“Starting tomorrow whatever life throws at me, I'm ducking so it hits someone else."
“I get tired from just thinking of everything I have to do."
Funny life quotes will inspire anyone who may be going through a rough patch in their life. Life comes to each of us in different ways and it can get busy, complicated and even depressing. Life wasn’t meant to be that way and hopefully these funny quotes can put some sunshine in the lives of others. You can cheer yourself up with funny singing quotes, check it out and have a blast. I hope everyone will find these quotes inspiring and refreshing.