Funny Quotes For Kids
Funny quotes for kids are a collection of hilarious quotes for your kids that they will enjoy and you as well. Kids are usually the ones giving the jokes, but they can be entertained with some good jokes too. If you are looking for some ideas of ways to make your kids giggle with glee because of what you tell them, maybe the funny quotes below will help. Kids love to laugh as do all of us, so there is nothing to stop you now from making their day.Be sure to check funny quotes vacation as kids love vacation time and funny cooking quotes as they also need to eat right?.
Funny Kid Quotes
Funny kids quotes are funny jokes for kids and by kids to other kids. Telling jokes to children is a norm for many of us, so is hearing our kids try to do the same. Well if that is you, here comes some inspiration for your next bout of jokes telling. This selection is good and we know that every funny quote may not send you head over heels, but many will and that is what matters most. Without further ado, below are a number of funny quotes for kids to share and make your day.
Quote #1
“It’s not about how tired you are. It’s about how tired you’re making everyone else.”
Unknown
Quote #2
“If I ever go missing, please follow my kids. They can find me, no matter where I try to hide.”
Findyourmomtribe.com
Quote #3
“Never follow anyone else’s path. Unless you’re in the woods and you’re lost and you see a path. Then by all means follow that path.”
Ellen DeGeneres
Quote #4
“Having children is like living in a frat house – nobody sleeps, everything’s broken, and there’s a lot of throwing up.”
Ray Romano
Quote #5
“A two-year old is kind of like having a blender, but you don’t have a top for it.”
Jerry Seinfeld
Quote #6
“My Mama says that alligators are ornery because they got all them teeth and no toothbrush.”
Bobby Boucher
Quote #7
“Dear math, grow up and solve your own problems.”
HaHa
Quote #8
“When I’m too big for you to hold, I’ll hold you instead.”
Ashley
Quote #9
“When my kids become wild and unruly, I use a nice, safe playpen. When they’re finished, I climb out.”
Erma Bombeck
Quote #10
“The odds of going to the store for a loaf of bread and coming out with only a loaf of bread are three billion to one.”
Erma Bombeck
Quote #11
“Mother’s words of wisdom: ‘Answer me! Don’t talk with food in your mouth!”
Erma Bombeck
Quote #12
“When I tell my kids I’ll do something in a minute, what I’m really saying is “Please forget.”
Sarcastic Mommy4
Quote #13
“Graham: Everyone in my class wants to be a doctor.
Mom: What do you want to be when you grow up?
Graham: A cheetah. Or a pig.”
Unknown
Quote #14
“My kid is turning out just like me. Well played, karma. Well-played.”
Unknown
Quote #15
“90% of parenting is just thinking about when you can lie down again.”
Unknown
Quote #16
“When your mother asks, ‘Do you want a piece of advice?’ it’s a mere formality. It doesn’t matter if you answer yes or no. You’re going to get it anyway.”
Erma Bombeck
Quote #17
“Fog is just clouds that have fallen down.”
Dylan
Quote #18
“Cleaning your house while your kids are still growing is like shoveling the sidewalk before it stops snowing.”
Phyllis Diller
Quote #19
“What if the police lied and turned on the siren, but he was just going to get a taco for lunch?”
Jonah
Quote #20
“Mom Pro Tip: If you’re old enough to critique what I put in your lunch, you’re old enough to make it yourself.”
SarcasticMommy4
Quote #21
“I’d love to be a Pinterest mom. But it turns out I’m more of an Amazon Prime mom.”
Unknown
Quote #22
“Ow! My eye! I didn’t know where my hand was going. I thought it wanted to rest behind my head but it wanted to poke me in the eye.”
Gabriel
Quote #23
“I love when my kids tell me they’re bored. As if the lady standing in front of a full sink of dirty dishes is where you go to get ideas about how to have a good time.”
Unknown
Quote #24
“No one is perfect – that’s why pencils have erasers.”
Wolfgang Riebe
Quote #25
“The best way to keep children at home is to make the home atmosphere pleasant, and let the air out of the tires.”
Dorothy Parker
Quote #26
“My daughter Will be late for school ..because She Can zip her jacket by herself.”
Unknown
Quote #27
“You can learn many things from children. How much patience you have, for instance.”
Franklin P. Jones
Quote #28
“Are we taking the stairs or the alligator?”
Royal
Quote #29
“Mom: Good morning! Do you need a hug?
Erik: Actually, I need pancakes and not this hug.”
Unknown
Quote #30
“The biggest thing I remember is that there was just no transition. You hit the ground diapering.”
Paul Reiser
Quote #31
Mom: “Henry, you can come down out of time-out now.”
Henry, age 3: “No thanks, I’m at the French Revolution.”
Unknown
Quote #32
“It’s like no one in my family appreciates that I stayed up all night overthinking for them.”
Unknown
Quote #33
“I would be most content if my children grew up to be the kind of people who think decorating consists mostly of building enough bookshelves.”
Quote #34
“You don’t learn to walk by following rules. You learn by doing and falling over.”
Richard Branson
Quote #35
“I think I’m gonna be good for the rest of my life. Well, except when I make mistakes, but we can blame that on my emotions.”
Hannah
Quote #36
“4-year-old Auggie in front of boutique display mannequins: “Meet my new family, mom. They are the quiet people.”
Unknown
Quote #37
“Not all who wander are lost. Some are just moms. In Target. Hiding from their children.”
Jocieopc
Quote #38
“Me: *Has screaming children hanging off every limb*
Target cashier: Have you heard about our REDcard?””
Daniahmed_
Quote #39
“Sick Benji, age 3: “Mommy, my nose isn’t working. I need a new one, please.”
Unknown
Quote #40
“If you put duck tape on a chicken, will it fall or do you need chicken tape?”
Dekan
Quote #41
“And then I thought to myself, “What’s the point of cleaning if my family is going to keep living here?”
Unknown
Quote #42
“You can be a mess and still be a good mom. We are allowed to be both.”
Katie Binghamsmith
Quote #43
“The quickest way for a parent to get a child’s attention is to sit down and look comfortable.”
Lane Olinghouse
Quote #44
“Mom, stop dancing. Your body looks like it’s falling down!”
Henry
Quote #45
“Stella bantering with her new stuffed toy: “You don’t like potatoes? I don’t like potatoes too!”
Unknown
Funny Kids Quotes For School
Funny kids quotes for school aren’t any surprise as children spend the better part of their early years at teaching institutions. Education is a big part of growing up and what fun times kids had and continue to have. This means that there are plenty funny jokes for kids as it relates to school with their friends and all. Some of the quotes above prove that is the case and and the fun doesn’t have to end there. For more funny remarks be sure to read funny quotes of the day as well.
