Funny Quotes Of Wisdom
Funny quotes of wisdom take a very hilarious look at what it means to be wise and still sound funny. Anyone that understands how wisdom works will probably agree that the funny and wisdom may not work that well together, or does it? Well there is really only one way to find that out.
I was saying there is one way to know for sure if you can be funny and wise at the same time. A few writers have attempted to do just that and you can take a look to see how well they did.
You can tell someone something funny in a smart way, maybe that is wisdom or say something that makes sense, but do it in a way that is full of humor. By the way, if you are a fan of humor then read about me funny quotes and funny quotes about cooking as well, they will certainly be worth it.
Words Of Wisdom Funny One Liners
Words of wisdom funny one liners are the bomb. One of the best ways to tell a joke is through this method, its quick and to the point.
Many comedians and other artists who love to tell jokes, use one liners as a way to share their talent. It won’t be any different with some of the writers here, you shall see.
I have told you what to expect, so as you read funny quotes of wisdom below, have a blast and come back for more!
Quote #1
“When nothing is going right, go left.”
Unknown
Quote #2
“Never miss a good chance to shut up.”
Will Rogers
Quote #3
“The only way to keep your health is to eat what you don’t want, drink what you don’t like, and do what you’d rather not.”
Mark Twain
Quote #4
“The four most beautiful words in our common language: I told you so.”
Gore Vidal
Quote #5
“If you’re too open-minded; your brains will fall out.”
Quote #6
“Everything is changing. People are taking the comedians seriously and the politicians as a joke.”
Will Rogers
Quote #7
“A lie gets halfway around the world before the truth has a chance to get its pants on.”
Winston S. Churchill
Quote #8
“I live on a one-way street that’s also a dead end. I’m not sure how I got there.”
Steven Wright
Quote #9
“If a book about failures doesn’t sell, is it a success?”
Jerry Seinfeld
Quote #10
“Knowledge is like underwear. It is useful to have it, but not necessary to show it off.”
Bill Murray
Quote #11
“This suspense is terrible. I hope it will last.”
Oscar Wilde
Quote #12
“A lot of people are afraid of heights. Not me, I’m afraid of widths.”
Steven Wright
Quote #13
“The best way to teach your kids about taxes is by eating 30 percent of their ice cream.”
Bill Murray
Quote #14
“Rice is great when you’re hungry and you want 2000 of something.”
Quote #15
“Tomorrow is often the busiest day of the week.”
Unknown
Funny Wisdom Quotes Of The Day
Quote #16
“You cannot soar with the eagles as long as you hang out with the turkeys.”
Joel Olsteen
Quote #17
“Be nice to nerds. Chances are you’ll end up working for one.”
Bill Gates
Quote #18
“The truth can be funny but it’s not funny to cover up the truth.”
Quote #19
“Growing old is mandatory; growing up is optional.”
Chili Davis
Quote #20
“Nothing in the world is ever completely wrong. Even a stopped clock is right twice a day.”
Quote #21
“An apple a day keeps anyone away, if you throw it hard enough.”
Unknown
Quote #22
“My advice is to never listen to any advice, not even this one.”
Unknown
Quote #23
“I don’t think inside the box and I don’t think outside the box… I don’t even know where the box is.”
Unknown
Quote #24
“Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died.”
Erma Bombeck
Quote #25
“Those who think they know it all are very annoying to those of us who actually do.”
Unknown
Quote #26
“It’s so simple to be wise. Just think of something stupid to say and then don’t say it.”
Sam Levenson
Quote #27
“If Cinderella’s shoe fit perfectly, then why did it fall off?”
Unknown
Quote #28
“It doesn’t make a difference what temperature a room is, it’s always room temperature.”
Steven Alexander Wright
Quote #29
“Don’t be stupid, it might make you famous.”
Unknown
Quote #30
“I’m not arguing, I’m just telling you why you’re wrong.”
Unknown
Words Of Wisdom Jokes
Quote #31
“To lengthen your life, shorten your meals.”
Unknown
Quote #32
“Six feet of earth make all men equal.”
Unknown
Quote #33
“In a closed mouth, flies do not enter.”
Unknown
Quote #34
“No man is a good physician who has never been sick.”
Unknown
Quote #35
“Speaking without thinking is like shooting without taking aim.”
Unknown
Quote #36
“Be aware of the idiot, for he is like an old dress. Every time you patch it, the wind will tear it back again.”
Unknown
Quote #37
“Don’t sell the skin until you have caught the bear.”
Unknown
Quote #38
“Man who run behind car get exhausted.”
Unknown
Quote #39
“Wealth is like hair in the nose: it hurts to be separated whether from a little or from a lot.”
African Proverb
Quote #40
“If you dig a hole for someone else, you’ll fall into it.”
Italian Proverb
Funny Wise Proverbs
Quote #41
“The best time to plant a tree was 20 years ago. The second best time is now.”
Unknown
Quote #42
“A lie travels round the world while truth is putting her boots on.”
Unknown
Quote #43
“If everything is coming your way, then you’re in the wrong lane.”
Unknown
Quote #44
“When you’re thirsty it’s too late to think about digging a well.”
Unknown
Quote #45
“Choose your wife as you wish your children to be.”
Unknown
Quote #46
“There is no difference between a wise man and a fool when they fall in love.”
Unknown
Quote #47
“The woman cries before the wedding and the man after.”
Unknown
Quote #48
“Experience is that marvelous thing that enables you to recognize a mistake when you make it again.”
Unknown
Quote #49
“If you think education is expensive, try ignorance.”
Unknown
Quote #50
“Growing old is mandatory. Growing up? Definitely optional.”
Unknown
Funny Quotes Of Wisdom About Life
Funny quotes of wisdom about life are very dynamic and hilarious statements that make you laugh. The life we live can teach us a lot ad make us wiser, sometimes we look back and have a good laugh at ourselves. That is why anyone who took the time to read all the funny quotes of wisdom should find something that appeals to them.
These funny sayings can prove to be handy in the future, while for some of us, they serve as a reminder of what the past was like. Regardless of what category you find yourself I hope you were truly happy you read them.
On another note, you can also check out these funny educational quotes, you might just learn something new.
