Funny Quotes With Animals
Funny quotes with animals is a collection of hilarious remarks that look at the life of animals and more. If you are an animal lover or own a pet, you should be able to relate to many of the jokes shared today. To see if what I am saying is true, you need to read on.
Animals can play a big role in our lives and create memories that last. Some of these memories can be down right funny as you will soon see.
You will find plenty to laugh about as you read on and indulge in the words of the various writers who had something funny to say about animals. You can also check out funny quotes of wisdom and best funny cousin quotes for some great entertainment.
Funny Animal Jokes
Funny animal jokes are very hilarious and if you love humor, I am certain you will find today’s submissions very entertaining.
Animals are know to funny stuff and people are known to do funny things with animals. Combine the two and you have a recipe for laughter.
If humor is what you seek and animals is the topic, then you can read these funny quotes with animals and have a blast!
Quote #1
“Ideas are like rabbits. You get a couple and learn how to handle them, and pretty soon you have a dozen.”
John Steinbeck
Quote #2
“They say the smart dog obeys but the smarter dog knows when to disobey.”
Amy Hempel
Quote #3
“Sometimes I wish I was an octopus, so I could slap eight people at once.”
Unknown
Quote #4
“I’m sorry that I’m not updating my Facebook status, my cat ate my mouse.”
Unknown
Quote #5
“Taking a dog named shark to the beach is a bad idea.”
Quote #6
“Cats have 32 muscles in each ear, to help them ignore you.”
Unknown
Quote #7
“I named my dog “5 Miles,” so I can tell people I walk 5 miles every day.”
Unknown
Quote #8
“Rabbits jump and they live for 8 years. Dogs run and they live for 15 years. Turtles do nothing and live for 150 years. Lesson learned.”
Unknown
Quote #9
“My windows aren’t dirty, my dog is painting.”
Unknown
Quote #10
“You can trust your dog to guard your house but never trust your dog to guard your sandwich.”
Unknown
Quote #11
“I feel sorry for people who don’t have dogs. I hear they have to pick up food they drop on the floor.”
Unknown
Quote #12
“I’m not bored of being quarantined, last night I even struck up a conversation with a spider. Turns out he’s a web designer.”
Unknown
Quote #13
“Two mice are eating a movie film roll at a cinema when one says to the other: this movie is good, but the book was better!”
Unknown
Quote #14
“For the best seat in the house, you’ll have to move the dog.”
Quote #15
“A horse is dangerous at both ends, and uncomfortable in the middle.”
Unknown
Cute Animals With Funny Quotes
Quote #16
“Meow” means “woof” in cat.”
Unknown
Quote #17
“Some people talk to animals. Not many listen though. That’s the problem.”
Unknown
Quote #18
“Saw a chameleon today so I’m assuming it wasn’t a very good one.”
Quote #19
“Size isn’t everything. The whale is endangered, while the ant continues to do just fine.”
Bill Vaughan
Quote #20
“The household cat is really a tiger that has underwent three counseling programs.”
Valeriu Butulescu
Quote #21
“Birds teach us something very important: To whatever height you rise, you will finally come down to the ground!”
Mehmet Murat Ildan
Quote #22
“Dogs laugh, but they laugh with their tails.”
Max Eastman
Quote #23
“Did you ever walk into a room and forget why you walked in? I think that is how dogs spend their lives.”
Unknown
Quote #24
“The best thing about animals is that they don’t talk much.”
Thornton Wilder
Quote #25
“Anybody who doesn’t know what soap tastes like never washed a dog.”
Franklin P. Jones
Quote #26
“No matter how much cats fight, there always seem to be plenty of kittens.”
Abraham Lincoln
Quote #27
“Why do gorillas have big nostrils? Because they have thick fingers.”
Unknown
Quote #28
“You know why fish are so thin? They eat fish.”
Jerry Seinfeld
Quote #29
“A dog is the only thing on earth that loves you more than he loves himself.”
Unknown
Quote #30
“Outside of a dog, a book is man’s best friend. Inside of a dog it’s too dark to read.”
Unknown
Funny Motivational Quotes With Animals
Quote #31
“Dogs’ lives are too short. Their only fault, really.”
Agnes Sligh Turnbull
Quote #32
“I think dogs are the most amazing creatures; they give unconditional love. For me they are the role model for being alive.”
Gilda Radner
Quote #33
“Animals are such agreeable friends. They ask no questions, they pass no criticisms.”
George Elliot
Quote #34
“If you think dogs can’t count, try putting three dog biscuits in your pocket and then giving Fido only two of them.”
Phil Pastoret
Quote #35
“The most affectionate creature in the world is a wet dog.”
Ambrose Bierce
Quote #36
“My dog is a half pit bull, half poodle. Not much of a watchdog, but a vicious gossip!”
Quote #37
“Love the animals: God has given them the rudiments of thought and joy untroubled.”
Fyodor Dostoyevsky
Quote #38
“Don’t accept your dog’s admiration as conclusive evidence that you are wonderful.”
Ann Landers
Quote #39
“It’s not the size of the dog in the fight, it’s the size of the fight in the dog.”
Mark Twain
Quote #40
“I’ve seen a look in dogs’ eyes, a quickly vanishing look of amazed contempt, and I am convinced that basically, dogs think humans are nuts.”
John Steinbeck
Funny Inspirational Quotes With Animals
Quote #41
“Dogs come when they’re called; cats take a message and get back to you later.”
Mary Bly
Quote #42
“From the dog’s point of view, his master is an elongated and abnormally cunning dog.”
Mabel Louise Robinson
Quote #43
“God loved the birds and invented trees. Man loved the birds and invented cages.”
Jacques Deval
Quote #44
“Dogs and philosophers do the greatest good and get the fewest rewards.”
Diogenes
Quote #45
“Money can buy you a fine dog, but only love can make him wag his tail.”
Kinky Friedman
Quote #46
“I find that ducks’ opinion of me is greatly influenced by whether I have bread.”
Mitch Hedberg
Quote #47
“What do dogs do on their day off? Can’t lie around – that’s their job.”
George Carlin
Quote #48
“Scratch a dog and you’ll find a permanent job.”
Franklin P. Jones
Quote #49
“What does a snail say when he rides on the back of a turtle? ‘Whee!’”
Will Durst
Quote #50
“Dogs are the leaders of the planet. If you see two life forms, one of them is making a poop, the other one’s carrying it for him, who would you assume is in charge?”
Jerry Seinfeld
Animal Sayings And Quotes
Animal sayings and quotes show just how funny it can be to talk about animals. These creatures can prove a blessing to our lives even though they aren’t like us. We love the attention we get and how they react when they see us or we show them love.
I hope this was seen after reading funny quotes with animals as it shows just how much animals are involved in the lives of many of us.
For those of you who can’t get enough of a good joke, you can also check out funny farewell quotes, it is amazing how people say goodbye.
